See, if you try to walk ahead keeping you head turned back, how will that be possible? Just wake up and see, whatever has happened has happened, it’s finished. Life is new every moment.
Just focus on life right now, this very moment. Drop this questioning, “Oh, why did this happen this way? Why did it not happen that way?”
There is nothing to gain by thinking about the past over and over again. Let it go!
See, I have no experience in these matters (laughter). How do I tell you this? I would say, you should listen to her and agree, for she is the boss at home! She is literally like the Prime Minister at home. What can you do? You need to find out some way to talk to her and make her understand. If you do not know, then consult and learn some new ways from others.
There is a small story about this. There was once a gentleman whose wife would do the exact opposite of everything that he said. Suppose if the man said, “I do not wish to have any gravy dish for dinner”, the wife would cook only gravy dishes for dinner.
If he would say, “I do not wish to wear a blue shirt to office today”, she would only iron a blue shirt for him to wear, and she would put all the other shirts for washing. So this is how it used to happen. If the gentleman did not wish to eat out one day, that very day she would insist on eating out and have her way. In this way, everything used to happen against his wishes. The gentleman became very dejected because of all this.
Do you know that in India there is a club called the Battered Husbands Club? Have you all heard about it? Sometime back when I had written a short article on Women’s Rights, I got a letter from the members of this club. In the letter, they wrote saying, “Oh Gurudev! Why are you being so partial to women? Please have some consideration towards us men as well! We have formed a Battered Husbands Club also for this reason”.
Perhaps this gentleman was also a member of this club. He must have been quite troubled, and when someone is so troubled from within, they naturally become restless and sometimes go for walks by themselves. One day as this gentleman was walking on the road, he met a sage by chance. The sage asked him, “My dear, what is the matter?” He replied, “O Sage! How would you know what condition I am in? You are always happy and in bliss”. The gentleman then narrated his story to the sage. After hearing the story, the sage whispered a mantra in the gentleman’s ear. The sage said, “Now you just try this and see what happens”.
So the man went back and did as he was told. Six months later, he met the sage once again. This time, the gentleman was happy and cheerful. He told the sage, “O Sage! Your mantra really worked”. At this time, there was another man standing nearby who happened to overhear this conversation. So he also approached them and asked, “Please tell me what was the mantra you used”.
The wise sage then said, “Dear one, in a situation like this, always say the exact opposite of what your heart wants. Do not speak out what you want, and do not want what you speak out”. Since the time the gentleman was advised this, he followed this every day. The day he did not want to have a gravy dish, he would insist the exact opposite and ask for a gravy dish to be prepared. When he wanted to wear a blue shirt to work, he would actually tell his wife that he did not want to wear a blue shirt. So in this way, he was able to handle the situation by tapping into the root cause of the problem. This is real skilfulness. Yoga brings out this skilfulness in you. It makes you so skilful in communication.
If we are able to learn even this much, so many problems will get solved. Often we hear people complaining, “Oh, no one understands me”. I tell you, the real problem is that you have not learnt to express yourself properly. You have not been able to make others understand. This is the essence.
Хорошо, я хочу задать вам вопрос. Когда вы должны идти на работу,вы когда-нибудь уходите, не почистив зубы? Даже когда у вас много работы, вы уходите, не почистив зубы? У меня сегодня тоже было много работы. Я встречался с тысячами людей сегодня, начиная с утра. Но вы отказываетесь пить воду по причине того, что у вас много работы? Предположим, вы знаете, что сегодня у вас много работы в офисе. Разве вы просто встаете с постели, переодеваетесь в рубашку и брюки и выбегаете на работу? Вы идете в уборную или нет прежде, чем уйти? Если вы не почистите зубы хотя бы один день, с вами рядом никто не сможет сидеть. Таким образом, необходимо чистить зубы каждый день. Это гигиена зубов. Подобно этому, ежедневное выполнение пранаямы и медитации есть гигиена ума.
Чтобы освободить ум от всего напряжения и отправиться на работу в радостном и счастливом состоянии ума, вам нужно также инвестировать в это несколько минут каждый день. Уделите этому некоторое время. Как только это станет частью распорядка, тогда это станет частью вашего дня и не будет больше нарушать ваш график. Не важно какими срочными будут вопросы, просто имейте это твердое намерение - я посижу десять минут и уйду только после выполнения моей пранаямы и медитации. Как только вы дисциплинировали себя подобным образом - это все, что вам необходимо. Даже если вы выполняете это всего один раз в день, этого вполне достаточно. Если вы случайно пропустите это один день, все в порядке, не беспокойтесь слишком сильно и выполните это на следующий день. Но я не готов согласиться с тем, что кто-то не может найти на это время.
Подумайте, у каждого в распоряжении всего 24 часа. У того, кто работает по найму, есть всего 24часа, и даже у премьер-министра всего 24 часа. Им обоим кажется, что времени недостаточно.Сколько мы способны сделать и достичь за имеющееся у нас время - это показатель нашего мастерства.
It is good to meditate after finishing your exercises. Even if you meditate immediately after getting up in the morning and then do your exercises, that is also fine. Both are alright. You do both and see which approach suits you more. It is good to meditate during the Brahma-muhurtam (the period between 3 AM – 5 AM), but you need not deliberately sacrifice your sleep to get up at that hour to meditate.
Your trying to get out of it makes it more difficult (deepens the tendency or the impression). What you need to do is practice more pranayama and relax. Then you will see that gradually on your own, you will overcome it and these thoughts will not disturb you anymore. They will not come at all.
Well, expectations are also natural. When they do come up, you should simply be aware that by expecting you are only reducing the joy. When you grow in wisdom, you will see that all these impressions will drop off and give way to something much bigger and beautiful that you truly are.
