Success

4 Ways to Stop Worrying and Start Living From an Ancient Indian Story

By Madhumita Prabhakar | Posted: August 30, 2019

Let me tell you a story from the Mahabharata, one of the most famous classical Indian epics.

At the beginning of this story, five princes, known as the Pandava, have been banished from their kingdom for 13 long years. These princes--Yudhishtira, Bheema, Arjuna, Nakula, and Sahadeva--are living in a forest, surviving on a meager living. They’ve been banished because Yudhishtira, although righteous, wise, and knowledgeable, also has a weakness for gambling, and in a game of dice with the Kauravas, another brotherhood of princes, has lost his kingdom and wealth.

Yudhishtira’s brothers and his wife are enraged. They seek justice for the injustice meted out to them by the Kauravas. But Yudhishtira calms them, reminding them that he lost the game fair and square.

One night, when everyone is asleep, Yudhishtira wakes up in torment. Although he’s managed to help his brothers and wife feel peaceful about their fate, he still feels a deep conflict within himself.

He goes out to seek solace from a Rishi, an enlightened saint, living nearby.

“Oh great Rishi,” he says to him, “I was once the Supreme King of this country! I was powerful! I have ruled my land fairly and righteously., but look what has happened to me now. Why is this happening only to me? What have I done to deserve this?”

Isn’t this familiar?

While Yudhishtira is conflicted over the loss of his kingdom, we, too, face conflicts both big and small that leave us thinking “why me? What should I do?” We reprimand ourselves, too: “If only I had done this or that, it would have made a difference.”

For example, a hardworking employee who’s up for a promotion but didn’t get it might think, “if only I’d made a better impression on my manager, I would have gotten it.” A student who didn’t get accepted into an Ivy League University might think, “if only I’d performed better in the interview, I would have gotten in.” Even when we lose a loved one to an illness, we might think “if only I’d paid more attention to their treatment, if only we’d sought a second or third opinion, this might not have happened.”

Throughout our lives, we find ourselves in many circumstances where we are unable to look beyond the challenge or conflict that bothers us. We dwell on these conflicts, and analyze the how, when, and why of them. They take over our minds, and inevitably, lead to higher levels of stress.

But does dwelling on our problems create solutions? Certainly not. As spiritual leader Gurudev Sri Sri Ravi Shankar says, “Life is too short to solve one problem after another. Problems will get solved by themselves. There is a power that is walking with you, solving all your problems. And you’re certainly not alone in this! The key is to keep moving.”

So, with a goal in mind to move on from such challenges, here are a few nuggets of wisdom to help you overcome your problems.

1. Understand what you can and can’t control

It’s safe to say that many things are not under our control. The weather, the economy, your next-door neighbor, or even your own spouse or children are all wild cards!

Think about this. How many times have you laid out a perfect plan, only to look back later and realize that the outcome of life was in fact very different than how you envisioned it?

But the good news is that what you cannot control, you can overcome by changing your perspective. As the old adage goes, people and circumstances will affect you only to the extent that you allow them to.

When you understand this, you will find relief, and learn how to weather the ups and downs of life more gracefully.

2. Set a time to dwell on it

My great grandmother would often say, “if something is troubling you, if you are faced with a challenge, set aside a time for it; an hour or so. Think all you want about it. Feel remorse, worry, or sadness. Experience it during that period you have set aside. Once the time is up, move on. Don’t think about it again.”

This is a wonderful piece of wisdom she shared with us. Setting aside a time to process our problems benefits us in two ways; one, you don’t allow yourself to dwell on it for more than a particular period. And two, by the time you get to that point of thinking about it, say later in the day, you might even forget about it, or be able to think about it objectively and with more clarity.

3. Identify healthy distractions

One of the best ways to keep the mind from dwelling is to engage in activities that occupy your mind, and even make you feel more positive. Engaging in physical activity every day releases endorphins, the ‘feel-good’ chemical in the body, which relieves stress. According to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America (ADAA), regular participation in aerobic exercise decreases overall stress, elevates your mood and self-esteem, and helps you sleep better.

Along with physical exercise, your mental health and resilience greatly relies upon maintaining a healthy diet, eating on time, and getting adequate sleep (8-9 hours) every day.

4. Breathe!

Try this exercise. When you’re dwelling on a thought, observe your breath. Most likely, it will be shallow. Now, breathe in to a count of six, and breathe out slowly. Try this a few times and observe how you feel. After a few inhales and exhales, your mind will feel more calm and relaxed.

The positive effects of breathing exercises, meditation, and yoga are being talked about widely today. For a start, these practices bring you back to the present moment, releasing you from the cycle of dwelling on events in the past or future. Aside from that, regular practice of these techniques have multiple long-term benefits; they significantly reduce stress levels, and help you become more focused and balanced in your mind.

I, in particular, practice the powerful rhythmic practice called Sudarshan Kriya that I learnt during Happiness Program. I find it extremely useful to keep my mind in present and focussed.

By incorporating these practices, your mind will naturally learn to spend less time dwelling on things you cannot control.

As for the response the Rishi gave to Yudhishtira, he said; “Don’t dwell on what has happened to you. You have been given the gift of time for 13 years. Use this time to travel across India and learn about the country. Had you been a King, your time would have been devoted to serving your land, but here, you have the opportunity to make use of this time to learn.”

And so, after 13 fruitful years of travelling and learning, Yudhishtira and his brothers waged a war against their Kaurava brothers and came back victorious!