By Donavan Wilson | Posted: November 11, 2019

Recently, a friend confided in me about her frustrations and battles. What could I have said to her?

“I’m so tired of fighting,” she said outside of the yoga studio. Surprised at how she reminded me of myself, I felt she had telepathically read my mind. Then I realized how unusually perceptive, empathic, formidable and resilient she is. While most of us sleep, she works out, swims, or runs at the crack of dawn. 

In 2005, I started a personal fitness routine of my own. It consisted of resistance training and spinning several times weekly. Back then, I needed physical strength to fight for my dreams. But nowadays, my standards have dropped significantly, because I barely have enough time to recover from the workweek. 

Are we alone?

Sometimes, life resembles an unrelenting struggle. Are we alone in our exhaustion? I don’t think so, but we may feel lonely at times.

Americans are all about hard work and hustle. As a society, we work more than ever. In checking the statistics, I discovered the following: 

• The everyday American works 44 hours per week, or 8.8 hours per day, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics.

• Professionals in competitive fields, like technology and finance, work 60 hours a week as a rule and commit to smartphone availability during downtime.

• Contract workers, such as Uber drivers, often exceed 100 hours of work per week with no overtime pay.

We need a health and reality check. Our culture celebrates working past our breaking point. In the morning, some of us rarely, if ever, wake up feeling human. We cover our weariness by sipping coffee and drowning, or really augmenting, our sorrows in alcohol. Most of us are grateful for a full-time job, which provides some stability in a world dominated by insanity.

The need for passion 

Meetings at most companies feel like acts of endless futility and fruitless conversation. Cubicles crush our souls and suffocate our brain cells. While at work, we smile on the outside to appear pleasant at the water cooler, even though our souls are silently screaming for an escape. There must be a better, more fulfilling, and authentic way to live. 

In response to my rejected job application, a Human Resource manager emailed me, saying, “May you find purposeful employment.” I just shook my head in disgust at her condescending tone. In taking a step back from my perspective as a disgruntled guy on a hamster wheel, I suddenly realized the power of finding a purpose in life. 

Find something you love to do, and you'll never have to work a day in your life. For myself, writing isn’t my profession, but it provides purpose and passion and fulfills needs that go unmet during the workday. So I work to find a livable balance between pursuing my life's work and paying the bills. Like me, many of us may also benefit from finding fulfillment outside of the workplace. Are you lucky enough, unlike me, to find passion in your profession?

Inspiration from yoga teachers

After speaking with Sally outside the studio, I recognized the kindness and compassion flowing from our yoga community. The studio owner provides an excellent example of a purpose-driven life through yoga practice and teaching, writing poetry, and singing with the National Philharmonic Chorus. 

As for the students, they’re encouraging, considerate, and often cheer for each other. When one student gets into a difficult posture, after a lot of effort, patience, and dedication, a typical class erupts in celebratory shouts and empathic joy. And as if that’s not enough, the faculty shares their empathy, devotion, and attention to detail. 

While each yoga instructor is worthy of consideration, one teacher’s storyline deserves the spotlight. She is a mother of three, a breast cancer survivor, and also an inversion virtuoso. Her handstands continue to amaze me after I leave class. Ms. Unapologetically Awesome, your unwavering optimism and radiant light inspire all of your students. 

The human mind yearns for purpose, and the heart seeks something greater. Sometimes, this journey is rocky and filled with valleys. During trials and setbacks, the obstacles seem overwhelming. But even when our resilience seems spent, we can draw upon the strength of remarkable, real-life heroes. No one should endure alone. 

A previous version of this article was published by elephant journal. 

Donavan Wilson writes insightfully about culture, religion, spirituality, and politics, from his home in the Washington, D.C. area.